In His Own Words
About him
In retirement, every day is too short, regardless of how I spend it. I live alone, am accustomed to that & enjoy my own company, but can & do very much value spending time with close, long-term friends. They know me as trustworthy, a patient & non-judgemental listener, a gentle man with an irreverent sense of humour, and genuine in who I am. That explains why I know, understand & care about them, as they do in return. Music - essentially 'Black music' - has touched & moved me like no other idiom for the past 50 years. I play myself, have a well equipped studio in my attic & a stage piano in virtually every room. I also express my creative instincts in photography & have a good eye for detail/quirky subject matter. I try not to 'stress the small stuff. I have a 'no rush policy'. If tasks are not completed: tough! As long as they get done. I'm not so good at tolerating bad manners or people who are explicitly/unconsciously racist or dismissive/patronising. Intelligent people exist in all walks of life: recognise & respect that, I say. I could, I suppose, take more risks than I do... 'pick more daisies' too! Yes, I do tend to play safe & at home quite a lot. Not too many 'away fixtures' in my seasons & as for dating... perish the thought! At the same time, I enjoy & miss the company of women. These days, most of my close friends are men - good men - but they can't possibly offer female sensibilites & perspectives, which I sorely miss as a single man with a largely home-centred existence. Time for some music, I think....
About his ideal match
I don't think in 'ideal types'. Neither do I see any value in describing or identifying an 'ideal match' as it does not correspond to 'real life'. Being with 'the right person' doesn't come from 'data matching': it's determined by a certain 'chemistry', a dynamic, mutual understanding, closeness, acceptance of who a person IS - not how you would like them to be. Teasing out a possible partner or even someone with whom you might have a more casual relationship with recognisable reference points can be too nuanced & subtle; even inviting a wholly unexpected response, as I discovered two or three years after separating. I don't have room to expand upon it here, but it sure was an object lesson!
In practice, sharing interests or perspectives only takes you so far. The rest is thrown open to chance & variables that can only be 'evaluated' by a subjective process of getting to know a person, as they really are; not how they would like to be seen. If it doesn't work out: so be it. If it does: enjoy it. I have often thought that of all the women who have had the pleasure of seeing Stevie Wonder (my musical 'hero') live, only a relatively small proportion would transcend that shared appreciation & see a mutually compatible relationship develop from it. But who are they? What or who might they be looking for in a man? My problem is having the confidence to proceed with the necessary steps of actually meeting women again. I haven't taken that scary step during the past 9 years. I know why, of course, but it's safer merely to live my life quietly inhabiting my own interests & not upsetting comfortable horizons. But at what cost? In truth, that requires me to sacrifice or deny aspects of my real self: those things that are expressed in emotions & behaviour towards a significant person in my life. Am I ready to & willing to move beyond writing profiles & ticking boxes? The honest answer is... I don't yet know.
What His Friends Say
SCHWITTERS hasn't asked any friends to write a recommendation yet.
About him
Country of origin: |
United Kingdom | |
Location: |
Leeds (PUDSEY), Yorkshire - West, England | |
Gender: |
Male | |
Age: |
67 | |
Star sign: |
Virgo | |
Height: |
5' 8" (173cm) | |
Body type: |
A few extra pounds | |
Looks: |
Above Average | |
Hair colour: |
Light Brown | |
Eye colour: |
Blue | |
Relationship Status: |
Divorced | |
Looking for: |
Just online friends; Activity partners; Friends; Let's see what happens; A short-term relationship; A long-term relationship; Something casual | |
Have children: |
Yes, not living with me | |
Want children: |
No | |
Daily diet: |
Eat most things | |
Smoking: |
E-cigarette User | |
Drinking: |
Occasionally | |
Education: |
Postgraduate | |
Occupation: |
Retired | |
Income: |
Solvent | |
Ethnicity: |
White/Caucasian | |
Home language: |
English | |
Other languages: |
Ask me later | |
Religion: |
Atheist |
About his ideal match
Country of origin: |
Anywhere in Europe | ||
Location: |
Anywhere in Europe | ||
Gender: |
Female | ||
Age range: |
45 - 60 | ||
Star sign: |
Any | ||
Height: |
5' 2" (157cm) - 5' 9" (176cm) | ||
Body type: |
Average; Curvaceous; Full figured | ||
Looks: |
Above Average | ||
Hair colour: |
Dark Brown; Auburn; Black | ||
Eye colour: |
Blue-Green; Brown; Hazel | ||
Has a photo: |
Moderately important | ||
Relationship Status: |
Single; Separated; Divorced; Widowed | ||
Have children: |
Any | ||
Want children: |
No | ||
Daily diet: |
Any | ||
Smoking: |
Any | ||
Drinking: |
Never; Occasionally | ||
Education: |
University; Postgraduate | ||
Occupation: |
Any | ||
Income: |
Any | ||
Ethnicity: |
Any | ||
Home language: |
Any | ||
Other languages: |
Any | ||
Religion: |
Any |
- Not important at all
- Slightly important
- Moderately important
- Decidedly important
- Non-negotiable
More about him
Sense of humour: |
Irreverent |
Intelligence: |
Intelligent |
Ruled by: |
The head |
Party behaviour: |
An impartial observer |
Personality traits: |
Cautious; Easygoing; Faithful; Funny; Generous; Independent; Intelligent; Loving; Loyal; Philosophical; Realistic; Stable; Thoughtful; Trustworthy |
Valued qualities: |
Compassion; Honesty; Humour; Kindness |
Fashion sense: |
Classic (My tastes echo long-established norms) |
Favourite clothing: |
Some sensual satin lingerie |
Favourite colour: |
Blue |
Hair style: |
Short |
Eyesight: |
I wear glasses only when reading |
Facial hair: |
None |
Body hair: |
Smooth |
Disabilities: |
I have a chronic illness |
Body art: |
I don't have any |
Date activities: |
A music concert; A picnic in a park; Dinner at a restaurant; Meeting for coffee; Meeting for drinks; Going for a walk; Visiting a gallery |
Music preferences: |
Jazz; Latin; R&B / Soul |
Reading: |
I read newspapers occasionally |
Books: |
(Auto)biographies; Non-fiction |
TV habits: |
I prefer listening to the radio |
TV programmes: |
Movie Channels |
Movie frequency: |
Never |
Movie preferences: |
Cult Classics; Drama; Independent |
Interests: |
Cooking; Music; Photography |
Sports: |
Cycling; Table Tennis |
Cooking: |
I quite like cooking |
Food: |
Chinese; Indian; Vietnamese |
Go Out to Eat: |
I always cook at home |
Dietary Restrictions: |
I have none |
Pace of Life: |
Chilled |
Time at work: |
I'm retired |
Pastimes of choice: |
Pursuing a hobby |
Time online: |
I'm on for an hour or two a day |
Take drugs: |
Never |
Family size: |
I've got sisters |
Family contact: |
I rarely see them |
Relationship Type: |
I'm just plain single |
Willing to Relocate: |
I'm unlikely to move |
Pets (Like): |
Bird(s); Cat(s); Dog(s) |
Turn-ons: |
Intelligence |
Religious attendance: |
Never |
Dream home: |
Eco home in the countryside |
Politics: |
Labour |
Feelings about using Jazz FM Dating: |
Nervous; Curious |
Honesty: |
Extremely |